Is this all there is? ADHD, career success and the missing piece
- Louise Foddy
- 6 days ago
- 4 min read
When ‘Success’ Doesn’t Feel Like Enough
Have you ever had that nagging feeling that something’s off-but you can’t quite put your finger on what?
You’re not burnt out, not exactly unhappy… but also not deeply fulfilled.
You go through the motions, show up for the meetings, hit the deadlines, and keep things moving-but it feels a little like you’re running on autopilot.
This state has a name: languishing. And for many high-achieving professionals with ADHD, it can sneak in quietly, hidden beneath a busy calendar and long to-do lists.
What is Languishing?
Languishing sits in that in-between space-not depressed, but not thriving either.
Psychologist Dr. Anthony Grant described it as “low levels of psychological well-being without high levels of distress.” You may still be functioning, still succeeding by most external standards, but internally you feel unmotivated, disconnected, exhausted or emotionally flat.
It’s like being stuck in neutral. You're moving, but there’s no real traction. No deeper sense of direction. No energising joy.
For professionals with ADHD-especially those who’ve always pushed themselves hard to succeed-this can be particularly disorienting. You might look around and wonder, Why isn’t this enough?
The ADHD Twist: Why High Achievers Are Especially Vulnerable
People with ADHD are often driven, creative, energetic, and full of ideas. You’ve likely built a life of achievements through grit, resilience, and a strong sense of responsibility.
But that same drive can sometimes lead you away from what’s meaningful and into what’s simply expected.
Many people with ADHD are masters of action-constantly doing, producing, moving forward. But in the midst of that momentum, it’s common to feel disconnected from a deeper sense of purpose or "why."
The strategies you’ve developed to stay “successful” might help you function, but they can also unintentionally dampen spontaneity and creativity. You may be driven by a fear of slowing down-because if you stop, there’s a worry that starting again might feel impossible.
And when you’re constantly managing executive function challenges, there’s little room left to reflect on questions like:
✨Does this still light me up?
✨Am I moving toward something that matters to me—or just moving?
Why Meaning and Purpose Matter
Research shows that a sense of meaning and purpose is essential for mental and emotional well-being. It’s what fuels motivation, creativity, and resilience. It helps us tolerate discomfort, bounce back from setbacks, and feel fulfilled even when life gets hard.
When we’re connected to purpose, our work becomes more than just a job. It becomes a contribution. A way to express who we are. A vehicle for growth.
Without that connection, though, it’s easy to fall into a cycle of over-functioning and under-feeling: doing more, pushing harder, but feeling less and less satisfied.
That’s languishing.
And left unchecked, it can quietly erode your well-being and lead to deeper struggles with mental health, relationships, and career satisfaction.
The Lockdown Wake-Up Call
For many people, the global lockdowns during the pandemic were a pivotal turning point.
Suddenly, the world stopped. Calendars cleared. Commutes disappeared. The usual noise and distractions of daily life faded. Despite all the difficulties of lockdown, for the first time in a long time, there was space-
Space to think, to breathe, and to reflect.
Without the constant forward motion, many of us were faced with big, quiet questions:
⁉️Do I even like the work I’m doing?
⁉️What actually matters to me?
⁉️If I could build my life differently… would I?
These weren’t easy questions, but they were important ones. The forced stillness allowed space for deeper reflection-and in some cases, a realisation that the life you were working so hard to maintain… wasn’t actually aligned with who you really are.
This couldn’t be more true for those with a later in life ADHD diagnosis.
And then the world sped up again. But the questions lingered.
You Don’t Have to Stay Stuck
Here’s the good news: Languishing isn’t a fixed state. Much like physical fitness, well-being can be cultivated-with intention, support, and space to reconnect with yourself.
Coaching is one powerful way to do that.
A good coach doesn’t just help you set goals or get organised (though those things matter too). Coaching can help you reconnect with what really matters to you-beyond the productivity hacks and the daily grind.
Coaching can offer a uniquely valuable space:
✅To slow down the mental noise and clarify what’s truly important
✅To realign your work and life with your values, needs and natural strengths
✅To explore what meaning and purpose actually look like for you
From Languishing to Flourishing
Flourishing isn’t about doing more-it’s about doing what matters.
It’s about feeling engaged, lit up, and emotionally connected to your life.
It’s about feeling like you again.
You might not be able to change everything overnight, but starting to reflect begins the shift. To ask better questions. To create space for joy, curiosity, and deeper fulfilment. You can learn to design a life that doesn’t just look good on paper-but feels good, too.
If you’re feeling that quiet “blah” of languishing, take it as a signal-not a failure. It’s your brain and body asking for something more meaningful, more aligned, more you.
You don’t have to do it alone.
👉Want to overcome procrastination and other ADHD challenges AND explore how to build a life you love on your terms?
Get in touch and book a complimentary call with me ☎️
Reference:
Grant, A. M. (2020). A languishing–flourishing model of goal striving and mental health for coaching populations. Coaching researched: A coaching psychology reader, 65-82.
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